"Bad dog! Next time, bring both slippers and my newspaper. You know, the one with the awful Caption Contest on page A-2."
Your help is urgently needed. Together, we can inundate the editors of the PG with hate-filled e-mails about their lousy, unfunny caption contest. For fifteen months, the page 2 editors have published the lame and dated one-liners of illiterate yunzers.
This must end, if only for to save the integrity of page-2 neighbor Brian O'Neill.
I once had high hopes for the Caption Contest. A year and a half ago, I opened my Sunday newspaper with expectations of merriment and joviality. Sadly, the Caption Contest has run its course. The talented merry pun-sters of Pittsburgh have eschewed the Caption Contest and now add their unfunny remarks to blogs like this one.
Their departure has left a void in the Caption Contest, which has been filled by the following losers:
EARL L. BROWN, MORNINGSIDE
BRIAN AGNEW, HERMITAGE
CELIA BARLOW, SHALER
MIKE FOLEY, SHALER
HARLAN CLARE, ROSS
RON GAUPIN, NEW KENSINGTON
MOLLY HELLMAN, EAST LIBERTY
JANE PHILLIPS, McMURRAY