Monday, November 19, 2007

Things To Hate #420: The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette's Caption Contest

"Bad dog! Next time, bring both slippers and my newspaper. You know, the one with the awful Caption Contest on page A-2."

Dear Reader,

Your help is urgently needed. Together, we can inundate the editors of the PG with hate-filled e-mails about their lousy, unfunny caption contest. For fifteen months, the page 2 editors have published the lame and dated one-liners of illiterate yunzers.

This must end, if only for to save the integrity of page-2 neighbor Brian O'Neill.

I once had high hopes for the Caption Contest. A year and a half ago, I opened my Sunday newspaper with expectations of merriment and joviality. Sadly, the Caption Contest has run its course. The talented merry pun-sters of Pittsburgh have eschewed the Caption Contest and now add their unfunny remarks to blogs like this one.

Their departure has left a void in the Caption Contest, which has been filled by the following losers:

EARL L. BROWN, MORNINGSIDE

BRIAN AGNEW, HERMITAGE

CELIA BARLOW, SHALER

MIKE FOLEY, SHALER

HARLAN CLARE, ROSS

RON GAUPIN, NEW KENSINGTON

MOLLY HELLMAN, EAST LIBERTY

JANE PHILLIPS, McMURRAY

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ooh, ooh, I got one! How about this; "hey dog, next time finish ALL the peanut butter or I'll blacken both your eyes".