Monday, July 30, 2007

Detroit Dead at 306.


Detroit Michigan, known for her once stunning beauty, productivity and wealth, was found dead in her apartment at 3 AM this morning. Ms Michigan's body was found riddled with bullets in an apparent gang conflict involving drugs, Hummer H2's, and an inefficient homogeneous economic structure plagued by class and racial discord. Police took several white liberal social-engineers and Toyota executives in for questioning last night, but insiders said Ms Michigan had it coming. Her flirtations with the former, and ignorance of the latter, could yield little else.

Viewings are postponed pending autopsy.

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