Monday, October 03, 2005

Breasts, Bibles, and the Meta-Media

You will likely think this post is all over the place, but rest assured you will be treated to a titillating discussion of breasts and bibles. This will, in a roundabout fashion, lead back to my commentary on blogs as meta-media, having read an interesting 25-page novicle that Daingerous sent me a couple months ago from The Atlantic Monthly by David Foster Wallace about (conservative) talk radio and John "Call me Zig while I spell out N-I-G-G-E-R on the air" Ziegler.

You see, on the bus today, I kept looking at this woman's enormous breasts, that to my defense, were a little more visible than absolutely necessary, right down to the flesh-colored lacy brassier. I mean, come on, was she looking for an audience? I didn't stand there amongst my morning EBS brethren and gawk or anything, but I looked furtively a couple of times, to verify my previous glances. What did the rest of the gaggle think of these jiggling phenomenons? Disgust? Arousal? To steal a quote from a source I can't remember, I could go either way. Disgust because what's the point in showing them off if its improper to look. Arousal for obvious reasons.

Right next to the woman with the elephantine breasts sat another lady with cotton up to her ears, perusing a dog-eared bible. I guess people read and re-read bibles in sort of a transcendental-meditative way, rather than reading new books for actual knowledge. All the amens, and begats, and lyrical platitudes translate down to "Om" from where I'm sitting. Clearly, people can't read and re-read the bible looking for knowledge, especially since everyone just takes the parts of the bible they like. I bet big-breast lady is a Christian but reads the modesty references a different way than bible-lady.

To pork or not to pork? Is coveting okay if no one else finds out? Do bushes really talk?

I suppose religion is our meta-media for drilling down into what the bible means, and like talk radio, you can join a group that likes the slant you do.

Like the news, the bible says everything! And it says it sincerely, just like the news does, seeming to present the topic of spirituality and God as an answerable kind of thing. But is there an answer any more than there is an answer to why some kid gets struck by lightning at his 8th birthday party? Probably not. Okay, no. Is there an answer to the age old questions, should she be showing and should I be looking?

Thank God almighty for the meta-media, for talk radio, for my little blog, that lets me and John Ziegler talk about the real truths in life, about breasts on the bus, unabashed revelations of people, and why people read the bible. You aren't going to see a lot of breasts on TV.

And thank God for religion, because the bible is as meaningless by itself as a FOX news broadcast. Next time you pick up that over-used text, have a little perspective, and realize the best religion comes from the best people, not the best translation. That's gotta meta-mean something.

1 comment:

Write Your Wrong said...

looks like you are the scroller now!