Thursday, July 21, 2005

So there were three guys trapped on a desert island

After a luxury liner capsized, an accountant, an architect, and a marketing executive found themselves stranded on a desert island. Their faithful dogs had dragged them ashore, saving them from the deep, blue depths of the ocean. They made the best of their misfortune, constructing shelter, killing a wild pig, etc.

One day, the three were sitting around arguing about who had the smartest dog.

The accountant, who had a collie, said, "Well, I can settle this right now."

He gathered up a bunch of sticks from around their beach, and summoned his dog. "C'mere General Ledger. Here boy."

The dog came running up, and the accountant dumped the sticks in a pile in front of the dog. Remarkably quickly, the dog had sorted the sticks into two even piles of six sticks. And then he barked 12 times, once for each stick.

The architect said, "well that's really amazing, but I think my dog is smarter. T-Square! C'mere boy."

And the architect's bulldog came bounding across the beach.

"Go ahead boy," said the architect. "Build!"

In no time at all, T-Square had collected sticks from all over the beach and built a 2-foot replica of the Eiffel tower, in completely accurate detail.

And the accountant was mightily impressed, but the marketing executive was not, "Well, you both really do have very smart dogs, but I don't think they are as smart as Bullshit. Get over here Bullshit!"

Slowly, Bullshit peered over at the three of them and the two dogs from his spot in the shade of a palm tree. The fat, lumbering mutt roused himself with a low grumble and slowly made his away over. He snuffled around a bit, and then a in a flurry, the marketing exec's dog tore the Eiffel tower to bits, scattered General Ledger's piles of sticks, screwed both dogs in the ass, and went back to his spot under the palm tree.

2 comments:

Celanie Polanick said...

Dude, where do I begin?
1. This is absolutely not funny.
2. It's not smart to represent yourself to the world this way, especially since you don't know who could be reading the blog. (Yes, I know that you have stupid software to tell you who HAS read the blog, but obviously that's not the same thing.)
3. You have absolutely no idea how to use commas. None. Calling yourself a professional writer before you have mastered the use of the comma is like calling yourself a chef if you've never heard of bread.
Now get back to work, for God's sake!!!

aimee said...

you know, i'm gonna haveta go ahead and agree that this isn't that funny...